10.10.10

God resides within Me...

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it” – Rumi

Be it love for a soul-mate or love for God, for I seek both, this makes sense to me… Fortunately, I sometimes forget about my search for a soul-mate… helps me live for myself and also not make any mistakes anymore, for this time around, I am not settling for anything less.

I’ve been searching for God for sometime now. Without looking for him at home, I’ve given up the search here. That’s probably because everything in my life tells me that he (will call him ‘he’ for convenience’ sake) is not here, if ‘here’ is where I live. He isn’t here because here statues are worshipped, and adorned, and blindly given one’s everything to whilst the beggar on the street dies on a cold, winter morning, not too far from one’s house. Here is where your people killed people who believe in another version of God – may be a bearded one or a turbaned one. God does not live where humans kill each other in his name. For all that he might or might not be; he isn’t someone who can allow such a thing.

So, when I went to a place where they believed in peace because their god strongly recommended it, I was tempted to join them… and follow their god. Then I found out that that would need for me to read a whole lot of literature and scriptures… and my heart didn’t urge me to make that effort.

I then came back to our gods, here, where I live. Someone close to my heart was going through a period of fire. That someone didn’t find it hard to find God; so, I followed in their footsteps and tried to find God in my rosary beads, in my bedtime prayers, in my chants, and my pleading, my tears… all for that someone to not be made to suffer.

Did I find God? No.

I still can’t understand that time. How did I manage to, for that period of time, believe and pray?

Today, I find around me, answers like… God resides within me, as myself… God resides in my heart… Whatever you do, don’t break someone’s heart because God resides in every person’s heart…

I think I will continue to look for him, for an ethereal support system but until that time… I can live with this - God resides within me, as myself!


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11 comments:

Pushkaraj said...

Nobody realized this more than Kabir

माला कहे है काठ की तू क्यों फेरे मोहे
मन का मनका फेर दे तुरत मिला दूं तोहे

Do persist with your search. Sometimes, I wonder if the search is more important than the destination. To the extent that, search 'becomes' the destination.

sacredeastwind said...

"...I wonder if the search is more important than the destination. To the extent that, search 'becomes' the destination."

I really like that. I will remember it :)

mekkanikal said...

It's all about having faith in god's existence. Those idols, temples etc are just there to strengthen the faith. We will never find him till we believe he's around. Eh, I never knew I would talk about god like this but you do make me think :)

"God resides within me, as myself!" means you do have faith in him/her/it? but can't see why you need to worship the idol or go to a specific place to bring out the good in you? *overthinking*


I think it's about time blogspot gets a "like" button. *thumbs up* for now!

sacredeastwind said...

Hehe! "I never knew I would talk about god like this but you do make me think :)" - same pinch!

Your interpretation of 'God resides within me, as myself' is completely apt... its from Eat.Pray.Love - you're probably rolling your eyes but it made sense to me - the film, on the whole, did!

Also brings you back to the simple thing - if you love yourself, believe that the higher power resides within you, then you can be a good person... and that IS the most important thing, right?! As long as you're doing that you'll be fine...

Was just going through some stuff and felt the need to write this down I guess.

You're right about blogspot. At the moment, with the new design, it doesn't even display the share signs on my page!!

Anonymous said...

Balike, yeh Vanprastha Ashram ka Samay Nahin Hai!

sacredeastwind said...

:P hehe! Identify yourself, stranger!

Rahul Khattar said...

Just happen to browse by your blog....A self discovery is the most essential element in finding anything and everything one may need. Being honest with oneself is the key.

mekkanikal said...

Ahh. I haven't seen/read Eat.Pray.Love yet but I want to. Haven't heard many good things about it but I will watch it for Julia Roberts and then decide :) *drools*

And you are absolutely right about "if you love yourself, believe that the higher power resides within you,".

ShadowKing said...

I agree with you... Being a good person is truly a way to god...

Though one thing I am a bit confused by reading this post...

Were you an Athiest at any point of time and then started believing in god due to some difficult times or something ?
And did someone break your heart or something ?

sacredeastwind said...

Umm, I guess I was an Athiest before this time when something happened that made me feel the need to pray. But it wasn't something as fickle as a heartbreak... Don't get me wrong, a heartbreak can be life-threatening to some but that wasn't the case. A loved one was ill... now that person is well, healthy. So, all good :)

And the search continues... for a belief system I guess.

VIKRUMSETH said...

A for Awareness in you did ring the bell.. Ten Ten Ten

PavitraPaawanPawan :-)