Is Romanticism that simple?
" ... we don't get married for passion ... we get married because we need a witness ... we get married so we have someone who can tell us ... you're life isn't insignificant - its significant to me .. your life will not pass by unnoticed - for I will be there to witness it"
Is that the crux? The root of the root and the bud of the buds ? Is that what companionship means? The companionship between a man and a woman who bind themselves together in sickness and in health, till death do them part ???
Is that what we crave? It is isn't it?
... for I know if I didn't at regular intervals in my life, have someone to make an impression on, be it a man or a woman (for this is about the mental aspect of companionship rather than the physical) ... I would perish into insignificance, stricken with melancholia, aimlessness, rootlessness ...
I am blank these days. When I think of what lies ahead, I think of work with as less passion as someone like me can possibly, dangerously have and I know this is what is driving me one step closer to the edge each passing nanosecond ... and it hurts.
I am eager now more than ever to have my old life back - a life full of turbulence like bad weather - a life replete with tears of heartache, of joy, of sadness, of nothingness. I am waiting to meet someone again who will instill in me emotions that will move my heart, and make it want to do all things 'insane'.
I am dying to feel that insatiable sensation of butterflies in the stomach every morning one wakes up ... when there is someone to please ... tasks to be achieved ... when each act natural or unnatural is as pleasurable as soft bursts of light upon closing your eyes, which smell infantile and heavenly.
Is it right? Is it justified? This dependence?